Some days I don’t know why I pick up the paper! The news is rarely good and inspiring, but rather a sure-fire way to start the day on a downer. So this morning on the way in to work I grabbed the usual free news publication and settled in for the stressor of the day.
Let me start off by saying that the actions of thoughtlessness and outright meanness that led to the sad choice that Amanda Todd made to end her tortured life make me physically ill. So today, Jumping off the front page is the headline “Slur on teen’s memorial page costs Ontario man his job” – the article went on to describe his disgusting comment and then proceeded to offer a his version of a somewhat left-handed apology – one which I suspect we would not be hearing if he hadn’t lost his job as a result. Boo Hoo for him – did he think his comment was funny? Did he for one second think about the impact his words would have on her grieving family? I for one don’t feel sorry for him – if he is old enough to know what “stirring the pot” means, he is evidently old enough to understand that actions always come with consequences.
Society, in general, has become so disassociated with compassion and accountability for thoughts, words and deeds that we are doomed to be the authors of our own misfortunes. Popular and exceedingly tasteless television programming lacking in any intellectually redeeming qualities, violence filled video games, movies and music videos have desensitized us to the extent that we have become to tolerate bad behavior as a means of acceptable entertainment.
Children spend more time stressing over how to be “cool” in the eyes of their peers than they do sleeping. It’s virtually impossible to ensure that our children are getting the messages that we want them to hear “loud and clear” because of the immense amount of “noise” and interference from these external influences!
Increasingly sexual, violent and bloody video games which are marketed to younger and younger audiences make it seem “ok” to those who are really not prepared to fully understand the consequences. It’s surreal and without any tangible fallout – at least on the surface. But, make no mistake there is indeed fallout – just look at the fact that we are seeing increasingly more violent crimes committed by younger and younger perpetrators – more and more, young girls getting pregnant and more violence born out of frustration and despair.
Reality shows which tout and encourage the absolute worst kind of human interactions – lying, deceiving, plotting alliances for personal gain, empty promises and outright rude and bad behavior have become the norm. “Yardy” or abhorrent behavior by characters on animated television shows, which are popular with children, but in reality, geared to a more adult audience, are having an immense influence on children who are watching without supervision.
Gone are the days where pleasant and moral messaged media guide our children along a path where they learn to be tolerant, forgiving and generous – that’s too lame in their considered opinion.
There is an overwhelming stream of media which is constantly pushing the boundary of taste both in reporting and in programming, all under the guise of “freedom of speech” and “right to choose” banners. Information of all kinds is available at the click of a mouse and there is really very little means of filtering what information is disseminated. Few safeguards are in place on “adult” content programs or sites, which would prevent our children from witnessing scenarios which they are not emotionally or intellectually prepared to understand.
Much has been said about the fact that the parents of the bullies in this case should be made accountable – I disagree to a point. Yes, they should be more engaged in the raising of their children, but the reality of this is that in many cases parents are completely unaware of what their children are getting up to until it’s too late!
Unfortunately, nowadays more and more children are finding themselves with more unsupervised time on their hands – extra-curricular school activities have been eradicated as teachers leverage them for contract negotiations; the expense of having children in sports or other activities has become financially unattainable for many; and, finally an unprecedented increase in young single-parent situations who themselves are ill-equipped to be parents.
Parents, Grand-Parents, Aunts, Uncles, friends, neighbors, teachers, and everybody in the community have a moral obligation to make a child’s life more joyful, more stable and safe. If we all took an active role in protecting the innocence of the vulnerable members of our society these tragic events would be fewer and far between.
So while parents have an obligation to raise their children to be contributing and compassionate human beings, it does indeed take a village to raise a child.
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